i'm done.

I'm done I feel like talking
Without you here there is more to say
I don't want you thinking I'm unhappy

you come and go as you please.
you'll call me up one day just to talk, and then I won't hear from you for a month.
you toy with my emotions.
your always there but never really there.
you tell me one thing, then go and contradict yourself.
your a hypocrit.
I see right through you.

Get over yourself.

I keep giving it in but I should know better,because there was something about the way you looked at me and it's strange how that things change
you look at me and say "you frustrate me" like you're thinking of lines and times, I missed my chance
And chances are it won't be coming back to me

I keep giving in, but I know better.


"Well I swear I tried again, your never visible on the weekdays When I need you to do what you can't afford to do
You better watch your tone. Your not invisible you know
I'll do what I gotta do to stop the sound coming

Cause the truth is you're probably not as bad as I make you out to be
To the boys and the girls, that will listen closely. No
I'm the one that is happy. You can write the coolest songs
I was wrong. Yeah I'm always wrong.

And my God what do we have here.
I've been trying hard and you've been dying hard for years now

Well I swear I did it all
I'll always be my best flaw.

Please just pick up the phone, am I invincible, you know
I'll do what I've gotta do to stop the sound coming

Cause the truth is you're probably not as bad as I thought that you were being
To the boys and myself, we're just tired of listening. No
I'm the one that is sorry. Help me write the coolest songs
You were wrong. Yeah you're always wrong.

Cause the truth is that no one, truly knows what the hell it is you're doing
When we ask are you dead or are you just sleeping Oh yeah
I'm the one that is happy. I don't like your shitty songs
You were wrong, yeah you're always wrong."

you used me.

Somebody tell me you’ve got love figured out, because I got news for you,it’s pretty messy right now. But I guess it’s always been that way. Wanting to be loved, to find somebody that makes your heart ache in a good way.. feel understood..


"I've come to the conclusion that if having things turn out the way you wanted them to is the measure of a successful life, then some would say that I'm a failure. The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments. Learn to let go of the past. And recognize that every day won't be sunny, and when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair remember it's only in the black of night you see the stars. And those stars will lead you back home. So don't be afraid to make mistakes, or stumble and fall, cause most of the time the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wish for. Maybe you'll get more than you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you. The road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination."




“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

I can't change what has been said or done, and right now I'm done trying to fix things. Phone works two ways, communication works two ways. I think, I've done my part. When you're ready, I'll listen just like I always have. The past is the past. You can't hold grudges, it doesn't do anything. I know, I held one for too long. You can't be bitter, you have to be "better" and get over everything. We learned our timing sucks, and thats that. You said last year, "I barely know you, but I don't want to lose you as a friend." Well know you know me a lot better then most people, same for me knowing you. I don't want to lose you, but right now I am, If thats how you want things, then I can't change you're mind...

under my umbrella

Lately I’ve been worrying about a bunch of stuff.. everything going on with my parents, friendships, life changing decisions, stress from school, working, next year.. a lot of stuff. but you know what? It’s not important and I really shouldn’t be stressing over it because God is in control. He’s in control of all of it and I have nothing to worry about. He will take care of it. I just have to pray and trust in Him through everything and it will all be fine. I’m confused about a friendship, but I’m just going to keep praying and God will work it out. I’m worried about my parents, but God has a plan for them. I know I haven't been giving my 1% lately with God, if it is God that is 99%. But I am going to start seeking again.

Reflecting on this year is not so difficult, it was a chaotic one for me, despite the laughs, fond memories and new friendships I gained. Chaotic in the spiritual sense, I was too busy about so many things, I got sick most of the time, And stressing about too many things, I didn't realize that God can take care of everything if I just let him.

God please open my eyes and show me the way.

You are the reason I live in this world.

Tomorrow is Christmas, which is celebrated as the day of Christ’s birth. The birth of Christ was God’s gift to us, to everyone. December is my favorite month because it’s so pretty, the cold air feels amazing, it’s the end of another year, and it’s Christmas. Christmas is the reminder to us of God’s love for us. He loves us so much that he sacrificed his son to save us.

This Christmas I’m going to stop worrying about all the crap going on in my life and just think about God’s gift and his amazing love for us, because that’s all that really matters.